Sleeping in Class

“Bracketology 101,” for the most part, a snooze.  Go ahead, bring it on again – evil-four-letter pundits like Digger Phelps and “Dukie” Vitale glossing over the brackets like they do every year with minimal insight. It seems every March, the analysis we should be looking to from these so-called veterans of the game is devoid. It has become an exercise of only naming who they think will advance in the brackets, accompanied with a running list of the star players on the team. This is then followed by a few “baby’s,” “PTP’ers” and “diaper dandy’s.”

We know who are on the teams, you so-called analysts. What does listing player names do to give a true and unique outlook? Bring something to the table. Tell us not only who, but some insight as to why. This waste of oxygen every “bracketology” season thoroughly bores me and makes the whole production virtually unwatchable. Get off the stage and leave it to the real pros that have something meaningful to say, for instance, Seth Davis of CBS.

While we are on the topic of issues with the selection shows, instead of running off the advancement of the top seeds in every match-up with a bore like a robot would execute, tell us why each team matches up well with another. Show us some depth, give us something someone else hasn’t said. It would also be nice to see you blowhards step out on the ledge a little, a-la-a Doug Gottlieb, and actually pick some upsets. You know there are going to be upsets the opening weekend, a few of them may be borderline epic.

Parody has emerged in college basketball at this point in the season. While the top two seeds, Ohio State and Kansas, are head-and-shoulders above the rest, the remainder of the top twenty are conceivably interchangeable. This is nothing different than what seems to unfold every March – there are the very few best of the best, and then right underneath them, a lot of the rest waiting to pounce. The Final Four usually features a couple of favorites along with a couple of underdogs.

Parody in sport should be appreciated. Come Thursday, it will be an utter free-for-all, which is the very definition of “Madness,” now isn’t it?  A little advice for you – start faking that cold today so when you call in sick Thursday and Friday, it will at least be somewhat believable. Good luck with that.