Houston Texans – Fansmanship https://www.fansmanship.com For the fans by the fans Fri, 12 Mar 2021 03:58:36 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.7.29 For the fans by the fans Houston Texans – Fansmanship fansmanship.com For the fans by the fans Houston Texans – Fansmanship http://www.fansmanship.com/wp-content/uploads/powerpress/Favicon1400x1400-1.jpg https://www.fansmanship.com San Luis Obispo, CA Weekly-ish Levine’s 2014 AFC Predictions https://www.fansmanship.com/afc-predictions-2014/ https://www.fansmanship.com/afc-predictions-2014/#respond Wed, 20 Aug 2014 17:40:49 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=15344 Every season the AFC seems to be the favorite over the NFC to have the future Super Bowl Champion. In 2014, the pundits seem to be thinking the same way. With teams like the Broncos, Patriots, and Colts, the AFC will look to regain its dominance that the conference has held for so many years. Like […]]]>

Every season the AFC seems to be the favorite over the NFC to have the future Super Bowl Champion. In 2014, the pundits seem to be thinking the same way. With teams like the Broncos, Patriots, and Colts, the AFC will look to regain its dominance that the conference has held for so many years. Like their NFC counterparts, these teams are quietly good. Here is a breakdown of all 16 AFC teams and how the standings will look like when the season is all said and done:

Peyton Manning and the Broncos are the kings of the AFC, but will they make another appearance in the Super Bowl? By United States Marine Corps/Sgt. D.R. Cotton [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

Peyton Manning and the Broncos are the kings of the AFC, but will they make another appearance in the Super Bowl? By United States Marine Corps/Sgt. D.R. Cotton [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

AFC West:

Denver Broncos: As football fans, we can all hope that Peyton Manning and the Broncos put the beat down they received in the Super Bowl behind them and get back to playing Bronco football. Denver especially revamped their defense with additions of DeMarcus Ware and Aqib Talib. They lost Eric Decker and Knowshon Moreno but this gives Montee Ball time to shine. The Broncos will be strong contenders once again next year.

Record: 12-4, division winner

San Diego Chargers: After making some noise in the playoffs, the Chargers are primed to try and build on that success, but 2014 isn’t the year for them. The AFC is so strong and even with the addition of Brandon Flowers, which I really like, the Chargers will barely miss the playoffs. Keenan Allen is an absolute stud and will help the Chargers offense but their defense is still weak which will be their downfall.

Record: 8-8

Kansas City Chiefs: I really hope I am wrong about this one but I don’t see the Chiefs repeating their 2013 success. I still can’t get over the epic playoff fail where they blew a 28-point lead to the Colts. Personally, I love Jamaal Charles but aside from him who is going to score or be a real offensive weapon? Look for the Chiefs to take a step back in 2014.

Record: 7-9

Oakland Raiders: The Black Hole should get excited this season and it isn’t because of the playoffs. The Raiders have built a semi competitive team for the first time in what seems like forever. Additions of Matt Schaub, Justin Tuck, James Jones, LaMar Woodley, Maurice Jones-Drew, and Khalil Mack will make this team interesting. If they could only get another WR or two, this team could be a playoff team. Plus this may be one of their last years in Oakland, so their fans better appreciate this team before it’s gone.

Record: 6-10

AFC East:

New England Patriots: With Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, the Patriots will again be a top team in the AFC. I am just worried about their offense. They get Rob Gronkowski back, but they lost Legarrette Blount to Pittsburgh. Blount provided them will a large spark of offense. I’m sure they will find a way to do it yet again; I mean they are the Patriots after all right?

Record: 11-5, division winner

Miami Dolphins: After almost making the playoffs last season, I see the Dolphins being hungry for the taste of the postseason. They seem to have put the whole bullying situation last season behind them and will look to bring Miami back to the postseason. Adding Knowshon Moreno will give them some extra spark to their offensive attack. I look for the Dolphins to win a wild card spot in the playoffs this season.

Record: 9-7

New York Jets: J-E-T-S. JETS JETS JETS! After adding Eric Decker and Chris Johnson to their offense and adding rookie Calvin Pryor to a defense that puts out Sheldon Richardson, Muhammad Wilkerson and Calvin Pace, the Jets defense is in good shape. While they are close, I still think they are a year away from the playoffs.

Record: 8-8

Buffalo Bills: IF the Bills can stay healthy they could an annoying matchup for some teams. They are still a few years away from really contending. I love the drafting of wide receiver, Sammy Watkins for them and they still have CJ Spiller and Fred Jackson at running back. I look for them to win a few games they shouldn’t win but they will end up in the lower-middle of the AFC standings.

Record: 5-11

AFC North:

Cincinnati Bengals: I understand that Andy Dalton has struggled during the playoffs but during the regular season, he has been pretty good. What I don’t understand is why everyone is so down on the Bengals this season. They are coming off an 11-5 record with a division crown. They drafted Darqueze Dennard out of Michigan State whom will vastly help their secondary, which was the weakest part of their top 3 ranked defense. Losing Mike Zimmer will hurt but losing Jay Gruden, as the OC will help them. Hue Jackson taking over means a more balanced offense with smarter play calling so no more throwing the ball at the 1 yard line. A second straight division title is in store for Cincinnati.

Record: 10-6, division winner

Baltimore Ravens: After missing the playoffs in 2013, the Ravens spent the offseason making sure they get back in 2014. Adding Steve Smith and drafting CJ Mosley out of Alabama are moves that will help them do so. Look for Joe Flacco and the Ravens to return to the playoffs where they rightfully belong.

Record: 9-7

Cleveland Browns: Johnny Manziel will dominate the headlines for the Browns this season and for good reason. If the Browns are smart and start him over Brian Hoyer, the Browns might have a chance to contend. Their only problem is that they don’t really have any receivers since Josh Gordon is too busy smoking pot to play football. Their defense is stacked with Paul KrugerJustin GilbertDonte Whitner, and Joe Haden. The Browns are a season and a wide receiver away from actually contending again.

Record: 7-9

Pittsburgh Steelers: After making a strong push for the playoffs last season, the Steelers fell short on a bad call by the referees. The Steelers are one of the best organizations in all of sports but that won’t help them in 2014. They are an older football team that will fail to make the playoffs again in 2014. They could surprise everyone and have a resurrection but I personally just don’t see it.

Record: 6-10

AFC South:

Indianapolis Colts: Too many times, people get caught up in what happens in the playoffs and they put players on pedestals because of it. I am a huge believer in Andrew Luck but the Chiefs lost the playoff game last season more than he brought his team back and won it. It was a 28-point comeback so that is a major failure by the Chiefs, but I am not trying to take anything away from Luck and the Colts. They benefit from being in the worst division in football and will again make the playoffs and look to build on their success again.

Record: 11-5

Tennessee Titans: It seems that each season the Titans have an average season yet don’t really do anything about it. They lost Chris Johnson and cornerback Alterraun Verner and Jake Locker has potential but has yet to do anything with that potential. The Titans will have another lackluster season and miss the playoffs again.

Record: 7-9

Houston Texans: Outside of their quarterback situation, which is extremely important, the Texans if they can stay healthy are just a piece or two away from making the playoffs again. Their defense is scary-good with Jadeveon Clowney and J.J. Watt on each side of the ball. They still have Andre Johnson and Arian Foster but both are just getting older so the Texans need to try and find a quarterback, and fast. Hopefully they can win some games this season and then try and fix the holes in the team during the next offseason.

Record: 6-10

Jacksonville Jaguars: This is a team that I really like in about two-three years. I hope Blake Bortles gets a chance this season as he has tremendous upside but for some reason, the Jaguars management doesn’t seem to want him to play in 2014. Marqise Lee was a great second round pickup for this team. The Jags will be back in the lottery of the draft but are only a few seasons away from making the playoffs if everything pans out.

Record: 5-11

Playoff Standings:

  1. Denver Broncos
  2. New England Patriots
  3. Indianapolis Colts
  4. Cincinnati Bengals
  5. Baltimore Ravens (won tiebreaker with Dolphins)
  6. Miami Dolphins

In contention: New York Jets, San Diego Chargers, and Kansas City Chiefs

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Black Monday strikes again for NFL teams https://www.fansmanship.com/black-monday-strikes-again-for-nfl-teams/ https://www.fansmanship.com/black-monday-strikes-again-for-nfl-teams/#respond Thu, 02 Jan 2014 18:01:15 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=11588 Every sports team has a leader. The success or failure of the team depends on the kind of leadership that is displayed. Most of the time, the head coach is the leader of the team and his or her voice in the locker room can make all the difference on deciding the outcome of a […]]]>
Bill O'Brien filled the first of the five NFL head-coaching vacancies. By BenJones88, via Wikimedia Commons

Bill O’Brien filled the first of the five NFL head-coaching vacancies. By BenJones88, via Wikimedia Commons

Every sports team has a leader. The success or failure of the team depends on the kind of leadership that is displayed. Most of the time, the head coach is the leader of the team and his or her voice in the locker room can make all the difference on deciding the outcome of a game. Especially in the NFL, a coach can make or break a team.

After each NFL season, the first Monday after the regular season ends is called by lots of media “Black Monday” — a time when teams re-assess their organizations. Many teams that underperformed fire their head coach and start the search for a new leader in the new year. This season is no different as five coaches were fired on “Black Monday.” One of the teams searching for a new head coach has all the pieces already and makes for the best available coaching position.

The Vikings, Texans, Buccaneers, Redskins, and Lions all fired their coaches after struggling during the season. Despite having the worst record in the league this past year, the Texans job is the best available landing spot for any coach. Just a year ago, Houston considered one of the best teams in the NFL and had a chance to make a Super Bowl run. Poor quarterback play and injuries plagued the Texans in 2013 but with the number-one overall pick in the upcoming draft the Texans have all the upside.

Led by Arian Foster and Andre Johnson on offense, the Texans still have two of the scariest and best offensive weapons in the NFL. On the defensive side of the ball, the Texans will still feature All Pro J.J. Watt, Brian Cushing and Kareem Jackson. All the Texans need is a quarterback and with the 1st overall pick, I expect them to take one. The Texans didn’t waste much time finding a new coach, hiring Penn State coach Bill O’Brien. The NFL is a league where teams can turn things around quickly. The fact that the Texans found a coach so quickly tells me that they believed that all they really needed was a new voice in the locker room to bring them back to being a contender.

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2013-2014 NFL Season Predictions https://www.fansmanship.com/2013-2014-nfl-season-predictions/ https://www.fansmanship.com/2013-2014-nfl-season-predictions/#respond Thu, 05 Sep 2013 19:10:17 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=10692 Ah it’s that time of the year again. It’s a time where every single player in the NFL and all the loving and passionate fans can have real hope that maybe, just maybe this is the year their team will win the Super Bowl. It’s great isn’t it? For a football fan, the start of […]]]>

Ah it’s that time of the year again.

It’s a time where every single player in the NFL and all the loving and passionate fans can have real hope that maybe, just maybe this is the year their team will win the Super Bowl. It’s great isn’t it? For a football fan, the start of the NFL season can be compared to a child entering a candy store for the first time in their lives, exciting and new. Each year brings new stories, new players and a healthy amount of restored hope.

As we await kickoff, the questions start to surface about which teams will still be standing in February. For the first time in my lifetime, the Super Bowl will be held in a cold weather location — MetLife Stadium in New Jersey. It’s going to be a great NFL season so here are my final pre-season predictions for the 2013-2014 NFL season:

Will Cam Newton finally lead the Panthers to the playoffs? By Pantherfan11 [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Will Cam Newton finally lead the Panthers to the playoffs? By Pantherfan11, via Wikimedia Commons

NFC:

NFC East: #4 New York Giants

NFC North: #3 Green Bay Packers

NFC South: #2 Atlanta Falcons

NFC West: #1 San Francisco 49ers

Wildcards: #5 Seattle Seahawks, #6 Carolina Panthers

AFC:

AFC East: #1 New England Patriots

AFC North: #3 Cincinnati Bengals

AFC South: #4 Indianapolis Colts

AFC West: #2 Denver Broncos

Wildcards: #5 Baltimore Ravens, #6 Houston Texans

Playoff Bracket:

First Round:

#6 Carolina Panthers @ #3 Green Bay Packers (Panthers 31-28)

#5 Seattle Seahawks @ #4 New York Giants (Seahawks 21-14)

#6 Houston Texans @ #3 Cincinnati Bengals (Bengals 28-21)

#5 Baltimore Ravens @ #4 Indianapolis Colts (Ravens 24-21)

Second Round:

#6 Carolina Panthers @ #1 San Francisco 49ers (49ers 34-21)

#5 Seattle Seahawks @ #2 Atlanta Falcons (Atlanta 35-28)

#5 Baltimore Ravens @ #1 New England Patriots (Patriots 24-21)

#3 Cincinnati Bengals @ #2 Denver Broncos (Broncos 28-24)

Championship Games:

#2 Atlanta Falcons @ #1 San Francisco 49ers (49ers 34-31)

#2 Denver Broncos @ #1 New England Patriots (Patriots 41-38)

Super Bowl: New England Patriots vs San Francisco 49ers (49ers 28-21)

Super Bowl Champions: San Francisco 49ers


Most of my teams are the same teams that have made the playoffs the last few years with the Carolina Panthers sneaking in this year. This is the season Cam Newton finally takes charge and leads them to the playoffs — and maybe even a playoff win. I can’t wait to sit back and watch as it all unfolds, remote in hand, RedZone Channel at the ready.

What do you think about my predictions? Comment below.

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No Surprise Here: Pre-NFL Draft AFC Predictions https://www.fansmanship.com/no-surprise-here-pre-nfl-draft-afc-predictions/ https://www.fansmanship.com/no-surprise-here-pre-nfl-draft-afc-predictions/#respond Wed, 10 Apr 2013 16:28:02 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=9810 It’s never too early for predictions, especially when it comes to the pre draft NFL. In the upcoming draft, each team will make selections to try and help their current rosters in order to make a run at that coveted Super Bowl ring. Although the rosters for the start of the season won’t be complete […]]]>
The Tom Brady "window" for success continues in New England, amazingly. By Mongomez93 (Own work), via Wikimedia Commons

The Tom Brady “window” for success continues in New England, amazingly. By Mongomez93 (Own work), via Wikimedia Commons

It’s never too early for predictions, especially when it comes to the pre draft NFL. In the upcoming draft, each team will make selections to try and help their current rosters in order to make a run at that coveted Super Bowl ring. Although the rosters for the start of the season won’t be complete until much later in the year, it’s still fun to look at what each team has done up to this point and make predictions for what will happen. Here are my predictions for the upcoming NFL season, pre NFL draft:

AFC North:

  1. Cincinnati Bengals: This is the team that I believe right now will win this division next season. They have gotten better in each of the last two seasons with stellar performances by their duo Andy Dalton and A.J. Green. Plus have one of the youngest and best defensives in the league. It will be difficult for the Bengals, as they have now made the playoffs in consecutive years so they won’t be underdogs anymore. With Pittsburgh and Baltimore on the decline, taking nothing away from the Ravens since they just won the Super Bowl, but I’d expect this division to be the Bengals to lose although it will be a dogfight throughout the year.
  2. Baltimore Ravens: The defending Super Bowl champions lost a lot of experience and leadership with the departures of Ray Lewis, Ed Reed and Anquan Boldin but they added some talent back with the signing of Elvis Dumervil. I don’t think the Ravens will win the division but a wild card spot doesn’t seem too far-fetched.
  3. Pittsburgh Steelers: The one time dominant Steelers team of the last seven or so years isn’t the same team and like the Ravens it’s the age factor. The lose of Mike Wallace is a big factor since he was a huge part of their offense but I think the defense who was ranked near the top of the league will keep them in games. Ben Roethlisberger is still a two-time champion and he won’t go down without a fight. That being said, they can still contend for a wild card spot just like the Ravens.
  4. Cleveland Browns: A good young team that needs to find a quarterback and an identity. The Browns showed some promise last season by fighting and playing hard in their games but like this league has proven time and time again, you can’t win without a good quarterback. It will be another long year for the Browns as they try and improve the team.

AFC East:

  1. New England Patriots: What else can you say about this team? This division is easily theirs and barring a huge injury or anything unpredictable like that, it’s almost a lock. Tom Brady is Tom Brady and will have the Patriots back to the playoffs with another division title.
  2. Miami Dolphins: The addition of Mike Wallace to the offense instantly makes them more of a force in the AFC especially since they lost Reggie Bush. They went 7-9 last season but I look for them to improve and make a run at the playoffs as a wild card type team. Tannehill has this team looking good and he can only improve.
  3. Buffalo Bills: I am going to go out on a limb here and say that the Bills finish ahead of the Jets in the standings this year. The Bills went 6-10 and I believe just need a few pieces to actually become a contender. The addition of linebacker Manny Lawson should help out a poor line backing core and adding Kevin Kolb might just be what the doctor ordered for the Bills.
  4. New York Jets: This will probably be Rex Ryan’s last season as the head coach of the Jets unlike a miraculous playoff run occurs which is unlikely. The Jets have talent, they really do, but for some reason they don’t know how to combine it and turn it into wins on Sundays.

AFC West:

  1. Denver Broncos: With Peyton Manning running your team, it’s almost a guarantee that you will make the playoffs. They had one of the best offenses and defenses in football last year and I expect that to continue even with the departure of Elvis Dumervil. Until Manning retires, the AFC West is the Broncos to loose.
  2. Kansas City Chiefs: I am taking a long shot here that I actually believe in but I say the Chiefs despite their horrid season last year, finish second in the AFC West. I really liked the signing of Andy Reid as the coach because I believe it will rejuvenate his career and give him motivation again. Also trading for Alex Smith was a major move as it gives them a leader that has playoff experience. They had six pro bowlers selected despite only winning two games, and they have the first pick in the upcoming draft so what’s not to like about the Chiefs? They won’t contend just quite yet but they won’t be at the bottom of the standings either.
  3. San Diego Chargers: I am not quite sure what happened last year with Phillip Rivers but I don’t think it will happen again in 2013. With basically the same team and the addition of Danny Woodhead, I think it makes the Chargers the third best team in their division. It won’t be as miserable for Charger fans next year, but it won’t be as good as recent years suggested.
  4. Oakland Raiders: With the trade of Carson Palmer and departure of Heyward-Bey, at least pre-draft; I believe that the Raiders will have the worst record in the NFL next season. The only reason they won four games last year was because Palmer, despite his struggles, can still throw the football and put up points. The defense wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t good either. I may be wrong but I think it’s going to be a tough season again for the Black and Silver faithful.

AFC South:

  1. Indianapolis Colts: The Colts showed us last year that it is possible to have the worst record one year then completely turn it around the next and make the playoffs. Andrew Luck is a stud and I normally don’t say that about young quarterbacks. The 11-5 surprise team got even better by adding Darius Heyward-Bey from the Raiders and LaRon Landry from the Jets. Ina addition they signed veteran Matt Hasselbeck, which I think will play a crucial role in Luck’s development in the coming years. Look for the Colts to win the division for the first time in a long time without Peyton Manning leading the way.
  2. Houston Texans: Many people will question my pick of the Colts over the Texans and I understand why but I have my reasons. Yes they signed Ed Reed to help boost the already stellar defense but the fact that they had the best record in the league at one point last year and then fell to not having a first round bye in the playoffs tells me something, they lack mental toughness. In football, like any sport, you need to have both physicality and mental toughness and that is something I don’t believe the Texans have. With that being said though, I still believe that they will compete but just not win the division again.
  3. Tennessee Titans: At least the debate over which quarterback will start for the Titans is over, this is now Jake Locker’s team. The signings of Bernard Pollard and Shonn Greene will help this team but I don’t think it makes them a threat in the AFC. It will be at least a few more years until the Titans reach the playoffs again I believe.
  4. Jacksonville Jaguars: Many would argue that Jacksonville was the worst team in the league, not Kansas City. There are so many holes on this team to fix and it will take awhile for all of them to be put together and make the Jags relevant again. Receiver Justin Blackmon is a nice building piece for them but they need more than him on offense. Jones-Drew is a nice running back but lets face it, he is very injury prone. The Jaguars will be back at the bottom of the lottery again come next April.

Division Winners:

AFC North: Cincinnati Bengals

AFC East: New England Patriots

AFC West: Denver Broncos

AFC South: Indianapolis Colts

Wild Card Teams: Baltimore Ravens, Houston Texans (Notable other teams: Pittsburgh Steelers and Miami Dolphins)

Playoff Bracket:

  1. New England Patriots (12-4)
  2. Denver Broncos (12-4)
  3. Cincinnati Bengals (11-5)
  4. Indianapolis Colts (10-6)
  5. Baltimore Ravens (10-6)
  6. Houston Texans (9-7)

6 Houston Texans @ 3 Cincinnati Bengals: (Bengals 31-24)

5 Baltimore Ravens @ 4 Indianapolis Colts: (Ravens 27-14)

 

5 Baltimore Ravens @ 1 New England Patriots: (Patriots 31-28)

3 Cincinnati Bengals @ 2 Denver Broncos: (Bengals 20-17)

AFC Championship Game:

3 Cincinnati Bengals @ 1 New England Patriots: (Patriots 38-31)

AFC Champions: New England Patriots

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Dreaming Up Al Bundy in a Tryptophan High; Turkey Day Predictions https://www.fansmanship.com/dreaming-up-al-bundy-in-a-tryptophan-high-turkey-day-predictions/ https://www.fansmanship.com/dreaming-up-al-bundy-in-a-tryptophan-high-turkey-day-predictions/#respond Thu, 22 Nov 2012 00:00:23 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=7278 In a matter of 23 hours and 23 minutes I’ll be numb-brained by an unstoppable force of tryptophan. But who’s counting? I’m set for the sedation. I went to the gym. Worked off who-knows-how-many calories in order to levy the oncoming attack of turkey legs, mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, candied yams, green beans and […]]]>

In a matter of 23 hours and 23 minutes I’ll be numb-brained by an unstoppable force of tryptophan. But who’s counting?

I’m set for the sedation. I went to the gym. Worked off who-knows-how-many calories in order to levy the oncoming attack of turkey legs, mashed potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, candied yams, green beans and bacon, buttered broccoli, rolls, red wine, white wine, champagne, bourbon, a lonely beer (who’s watching?), piece(s) of pumpkin pie topped with hand whipped cream, piece(s) of pecan pie and a secretive second-portioned concoction of them all (use potatoes as the base, then begin swirling cranberry and multiple others into the sticky starch based mountain of divinity).

I’m ready for Uncle Joe’s half-naked intoxication and Aunt Sally’s sassy pursed lip persuasions about another of her hippy skippy selling points on a Himalayan weight loss pill. I’ll dodge, bob and weave the children’s chattering food fights and face Ace, the silent untalkative cousin’s, snarling pit. It will good to be an American. Not only can a man let it loose literally, by unbuckling the slim fitting belt from the skinny jeans or slacks, but he can burp, fart and buzz on a triple-headed machine of NFL football without looking over his shoulder in fear. Blessings and all, am I the only man/woman completely over the traditional turkey day battles starring the irrelevant Detroit Lions and Dallas Cowboys?

I’m unsure whether or not the new triple-header can salvage the stupidity of watching Detroit (4-6) host the Houston Texans (9-1), and Dallas (5-5) host the Washington Redskins (4-6). The playoff implications here are as small as a flea. Dallas WILL NOT make the playoffs, continuing to disappoint, And Detroit? Detroit is an underachieving mess of young stars succumbed with a sophomore slump.The Washington Redskins are only exciting because of their super-frosh stud, RG 3, but even he, the last three weeks, has looked more human than superhuman, with multiple sub 200-yard passing efforts.

Tryptophan might keep Cowboys fans from attacking their televisions tomorrow. By AJ Guel (originally posted to Flickr as Over the Top) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Cue the television version of the Nutcracker.

How much Tony Romo can a man take, before he throws his 44-inch HD 1080-p television off his second story balcony (that is a made up image, I recommend you don’t do that unless you need your extended warranty check to cover rent)? Give it up already! Tryptophan can’t save Romo from the obvious: He can’t win when it matters. And it sure as hell can’t reverse the hard reality that Detroit plays in a division with Da Bears, The Pack and an upstart Minnesota Vikings team. The Redskins and Cowbowys are two teams with similar fates: Playofflessness. While the Redskins play just to continue the evolution of their franchise face.

So while the rest of y’all will be pretending you’re excited over the historic turkey day battalions, I’ll be sleeping, shellacked with peanut shells. I’ll be about as proactive as Al Bundy taking a third and fourthportion from multiple silent Peg’s in a dream. And when I wake, I’ll watch Uncle Joe call his daughter names while playing a game of boxing on the Wii, and pretend I care: “Uncle Joe, lay off Suzy! I’ll challenge you after another go on the pecan pie. Suzy go to bed. Joe you’re my bitch.”

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GFq6usPg6U

My predictions for the turkey day triple header:

The Houston Texans are clicking like no other team in football right now. Detroit has a struggling offensive line, which is exactly what J.J Watt and the fast-footed front line of the Texans devour. Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford has taken a large step backwards after his emergence last season, throwing just 12 touchdowns to 10 interceptions through ten games. The Texans will create two monumental turnovers, and Schaub and the offense will capitalize scoring ten points of those. Houston Texans 30, Detroit Lions 17.

The Dallas Cowboys’ speedy defensive lineman Demarcus Ware-led linebacking core, will rattle the spiraling RG 3 and his multi-dimensional attack. This game features two teams defensively underwhelming, but Romo, the man with a pro bowler’s intangible in games that do not matter, will outshine the more popular rookie. Romo vs. RG 3; Romo throws for 300 hundred on a poor Redskins secondary and Dallas wins. Dallas Cowboys 28, Washington Redskins 23.

In the “other” game, the biggest joke of the three, Tom Brady lines up against the Jets with no Gronk. But no Gronk means more Wes Welker, Aaron Hernandez, Brandon Lloyd and Danny Woodhead in the slot. The point is, the Pats are not struggling. Brady could line up a cohort of team cheerleaders, and I’d wager money of a Pats route over the mouthy New York Jets. The Jets giving Tim Tebow the ball, is the only news worth covering.  New England Patriots 30, New York Jets 13.

 

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NFL Divisional Round Playoffs: Separate the Men from the Boys https://www.fansmanship.com/nfl-divisional-round-playoffs-separate-the-men-from-the-boys/ https://www.fansmanship.com/nfl-divisional-round-playoffs-separate-the-men-from-the-boys/#comments Fri, 13 Jan 2012 02:12:15 +0000 http://www.fansmanship.com/?p=4703 The anticipation is rising.

Eyes will be glued to flat-screens nationwide for the entire weekend come the first kickoff Saturday afternoon in San Francisco. Rounds of golf will be cancelled. Agendized voyages to The Home Depot and Costco will be shoved aside. America’s dominant sports passion is nearing its penultimate moment. Adjectives attempting to describe will ring in hyperbole and previously planned objectives will mire below the paramount. One item takes precedence over everything this time of year: the NFL Divisional Playoffs are a can’t-miss – a must-see.

New Orleans @ San Francisco, Saturday @ 1:30pm PST, FOX

“Supposed” unbiased on-lookers seem to tab the Niners as the “most complete” team in the playoffs. I need coke-bottle specs to be able to focus on that description realistically, seeing as the Niners’ offense seems to stall against the few legit defenses they have faced, as well as even mediocre defenses for that matter.

This tends to happen when San Fran’s jumbo personnel – power scheme is stymied on first and second downs, and third and medium plus becomes a remote prospect for Alex Smith. A pee-wee football offense only takes you so far, and a conference championship game, unfortunately for Niner fans, isn’t that place.

Turnovers, special teams play and “x-factors” will be be the difference. The fundamental questions become – do you trust Drew Brees or Alex Smith with turnovers? Easy answer – Brees. Who has the special teams and xfactor-advantage? Easy answer, Darren Sproles over Ted Ginn, Jr.

The Niner defense takes a stand that ends up becoming too little – too late, and San Francisco’s offense tries to match the touchdowns scored by the Saints with field goals. In what should be the last game played in the wind-tunneled, seagull-infested dump known as Candlestick, New Orleans eventually separates themselves in victory, 27-16. Give this storied franchise a new stadium already.

Denver @ New England, Saturday @ 5:00pm PST, CBS

Denver will try to make the game shorter early, but will fail with the inability to convert first downs on 3rd and medium-plus after conservative first and second down calls. Tom Brady loves the middle of the field, as Rob Gronkowski to the post and Wes Welker on the crossing route underneath will gain the Pats field position. Denver’s chances are dismal at the half and will become non-existent deep into the 3rd quarter, as New England will lead comfortably.

In what will eventually be only a B+ day for the Pats due to the stubborn Denver defense, New England will manage the clock with first downs after the ball is punted to them time and time again due to the ineptitude of the Broncos offense, and will end up with a somewhat notable 28-10 victory.

Tebow, while not in victory, will righteously justify his creator by thanking the Almighty for the learning experience. As soon as the next Super Bowl Champion is done celebrating and spring camp is soon to open, the “Tebow polarization” question is still the NFL lead.

Houston @ Baltimore, Sunday @ 10:00am PST, CBS

There are a lot of people picking a Houston upset, yet the funny thing is, it is based on absolutely nothing other than a thirst for the unforeseen outcome. The bottom line is, Arain Foster alone won’t be enough to save the rookie-captianed cattle.

Baltimore has every advantage you can think of: home field, playoff experience, defense, quarterback play, and even the running back factor is a push at best for Houston. But even if Foster out-produces Ray Rice, there are simply too many disadvantages for the Texans to overcome.

While not quite a blow-out at the mid-point, the Ravens will come out after lunch and take control, outscoring Houston from the half somewhere in the range of 17-7, and coast into the AFC Championship game, 27-13. Baltimore in January is no place for a third-string, rookie quarterback. That’s a rule.

New York @ Green Bay, Sunday @ 1:30pm PST, FOX

The New York Giants can run the ball. The New York Giants can play in the elements. Eli Manning has solidified himself as an “elite” quarterback, which he so desperately tried to assert himself as to the media before the season got underway. But can Manning match the highest-tier of “elite level” that Aaron Rodgers is capable of in his own back yard?

Considering The Pack gets back from injury: starting guard Brian Bulaga, veteran tackle Chad Clifton and go-to receiver Greg Jennings; picking against Green Bay in the confines of Lambeau Field would tend towards the suicidal, I’m not looking to swallow cyanide just yet after only 31 years.

That being said, two weeks of rest for most of Green Bay’s starters may result in some rust for the favorite, as I wouldn’t be surprised if New York climbed out to a 7-0 or 10-0 lead early. But in the end, the frozen tundra, Sunday night momentum and juggernaut capabilities gets the Packers by with a defense that bends but doesn’t break, 31-20.

* * * * * * *

Baltimore @ New England and New Orleans @ Green Bay – could you ask for two better conference championship games? I guess you could if you are a fan of the teams picked to get beat? But that’s why… they play… the games.

Nothing is that easy to predict, right? Nothing is set in stone, right? Anyone’s crystal ball could end up being a bit foggy from time to time after all. But after a wild card weekend in which all the highest seeds advanced for the first time since god was an infant, the expected will again come to fruition.

Its time to separate the men from the boys. Favorites will rule and the conference championship games next weekend will feature those who we thought would end up remaining afterall. Yeaaa yeaaa Coach Green. Back off. The royalty check is already in the mail.

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