Swaggy P will be in Los Angeles for another four years. By Keith Allison, via Wikimedia Commons

Don’t worry Lakers fans. On the biggest day in NBA free agent history, your Lakers weren’t left out. No, they didn’t get LeBron, Carmelo, Bosh or Wade. They didn’t trade for Kevin Love and they didn’t lure a free agent away from any other team.

Instead, they reportedly locked up Nick Young for four more years.

Co-hosting the Sports Bite on ESPN Radio 1280 this week, Mike Wozniak asked me in as many words how long Lakers fans should be prepared for the team to be bad for.

I got the answer today. About four years. Don’t get me wrong though — I love Nick Young.

If my team can’t be good — and let’s be clear, the Lakers are going to be bad again next season — I at least want them to be entertaining. Nick Young is definitely that.

Young will give fans a reason to be in the building. On one side of the court you’ll find Kobe Bryant. Bryant, the consummate professional, will continue to hone his craft late into his career. He is a beacon of the Lakers’ dominant past and his riding off into the sunset sometime in the next few years will mark the end of a great era in Lakers history.

Contrast that with Nick Young. Swaggy P is as entertaining as they come. I watched three quarters of a game last year where he went toe to toe with LeBron James. For as much as Young is really bad defensively, he has never seen a shot he doesn’t like and he doesn’t have any conscience. If Manny Ramirez were a basketball player, he might be Swaggy P. Think about it — no defense, offensively gifted, comes off as slightly air headed. It’s a perfect fit.

In the town where he went to college, the USC product should be an entertaining sideshow while the Lakers try to rebuild. He will do things from time to time that keep them in the spotlight. He will have lots of memorable moments over the next four years. Don’t expect him to lift the Lakers a lot higher than they went this year.

What’s that you say? You’d like a full hour of Nick Young offensive highlights from last year? You got it!

YouTube is great, isn’t it? Here are some sweet older highlights. Hunker down, Lakers fans. The next four years are going to be at the same time impossible to watch and, if we’re lucky, impossible to turn away from.

The Yankees are standing pat on what they currently have, as there hasn’t been a deadline in recent memory where baseball’s top spending franchise has failed to bolster themselves in even the slightest amount.  They were in the Hiroka Kuroda sweepstakes along with the Chicago White Sox, but Kuroda ultimately held the trump card in the form of the no-trade clause built into his contract.

The biggest splash of the deadline had to be the San Francisco Giants acquiring Carlos Beltran from the New York Mets in exchange for the top pitching prospect in their minor league system, Zach Wheeler.  General Manager Brian Sabean was quoted as saying that the team owed the move to their fans, noting that the the Major League Baseball championship-winning window is a small one.

Almost a decade ago, Beltran was traded at the deadline to the Houston Astros from the Kansas City Royals and proceeded to put up the best August and September by a deadline acquisition in recent memory, only rivaled by Manny Ramirez’s late-season clip when he was traded from the Red Sox to the Dodgers a few years ago.  While Beltran isn’t that same player he was even five years ago, he does have the offensive ability to help the anemic Giants offense significantly.

The Atlanta Braves are contenders in the NL East as well as front-runners in the wild card standings.  The addition of Michael Bourn will bring much needed outfield speed at the top of the lineup, something Atlanta has severely lacked in recent years due to the ineffectiveness of Nate McLouth and the trading away of Melky Cabrera.

Ubaldo Jimenez will strengthen the Cleveland Indians’ pitching staff, as they actually have a realistic shot at the playoffs.  You would expect nothing less with a move like this from a team that is having a dream season after more than a decade of futility.  Jimenez hasn’t had his usual dominating season thus far, but his veteran presence and Cy Young-potential talent will bring some much needed stability and leadership to a young clubhouse.

The reigning Senior Circuit champions, the Philadelphia Philles, did not sit on their full house – they decided to try and draw to a straight flush.  The addition of Hunter Pence will help balance an attack that is left-handed heavy, and will only improve an already elite offense.  Getting closer Ryan Madson healthy will be the key to the Phillies running away with the East again, as having a stable finisher is something that is key for a team like Philadelphia, who depends on winning a lot of close, low to middle-scoring, station-to-station, National League-style games.

The Milwaukee Brewers bolstered their bullpen with Francisco Rodriguez, a great backup plan if their young closer, John Axford, happens to falter down the stretch. This move is by far better than anything the St. Louis Cardinals ended up doing at the deadline, and with the Brew Crew already holding a 3.5 game lead over the Cards, they have to be the distinct favorite in the Central as the finish line approaches.

The Pittsburgh Pirates added first baseman Derek Lee in an attempt to inject some run-production with runners in scoring position.  You have to admire the Pirates for being proactive, but their brutal schedule down the stretch coupled with their inexperience makes a playoff berth in the tightly-contested National League Central a prospect that looks to be futile at best.

The Los Angeles Dodgers traded away arguably their top outfield prospect in Trayvon Robinson, who has seen limited action at the major league level while bombing 26 home runs thus far this season in Triple-A.  As a Dodgerfan, this move baffles me, due to the fact that they only received two average minor-league arms and a minor league catcher who has only hit 7 homeruns so far this season in return.

The Dodgers franchise is not only selling out its fans, but now they are starting to even sell out their best players.  The sad fact that one of the greatest and most storied franchises in sports continues to get dragged deeper and deeper through the mud and filth is as disgusting as “owner” Frank McCourt’s existence as a region-wide punchline.  Dodgerfans seem to be almost numb to the debacle as it gets worse and worse.  This is a true testament to how low the franchise has sunk.  But, a brighter day is hopefully around the corner.  What brighter day?  The day that the inevitable happens – McCourt buys a one-way ticket on a flying sourdough bowl of chowder and flys his ass back to New England for good.

Having said that, one should digress this time of year no matter how bad your favorite team happens to be navigating the treacherous waters of the vast sea that is the baseball season. Regardless of the gravity of the moves that are made every trade deadline, the underlying fact always remains – some moves end up resulting in pennants and some moves blow up in a general manager’s face.

Who will end up wearing  the egg and who will end up wearing the ring?  Its about to unfold.

What if El Loco had made his tournament larger or had been reminded of some other great commercials.

With the tournament going on, I’m not going to play an “NIT” here, but I will talk about a few of the “bubble” commercials/music videos that didn’t make it. Bare with me here. Things might get a little ugly. Hope you get some laughs out of it. Be sure to cast your vote for your favorite in Loco’s tournament too!

SportsCenter Commercials

My earliest memories of SportsCenter commercials are from middle school and early high school. I loved sports and would have watched the show anyway, but in the mid-90’s, ESPN started to advertise their flagship show more and more. Along with “hip” broadcasters like Dan Patrick and Keith Olberman (later Kenny Mayne, Stuart Scott, etc…), SportsCenter was all I watched before school and before I went to bed. A bowl of cereal and SportsCenter was how I started and ended my day. Below are a few of my favorite SportsCenter commercials. I love them all, but here are a few.

In the League there’s something brewing, you can see it in Patrick Ewing.

When it’s an extra step he’s taking – it’s a rule he is breaking…

You have to pause it on the Scrabble board. The words are amazing. Shaq is top-5 greatest entertainers of all time.

Pot head. He’s not funny but I have to dig at the Giants where I can.

Blake Griffin. Love him. K-Love gets to show his skills too. It’s really fun to do this to people by the way. Shout out to Jeff Laing and Nate Brown.

Grant Hill used to be able to dunk so good. Also he’s a piano player… Apparently a good one.

This would be funnier if it was Will Ferrell and not really Robert Goulet.

Keyshawn and Kobe. Awesome.

And, finally, Manny being Manny.

Tracy Morgan commercials for Video Games

This guy reinvents funny. The “Every day I do” line is one that can be used in so many connotations. The Warren Sapp one is the best, but Tracy Morgan is a hurricane of hilarity. Love it.

Hahahaha EVERY DAY I DO.

Two freakazoids. Ben Wallace and Tracy Morgan have more in common than is probably healthy….

Manning Commercials

The Manning brothers are all-time greats, when it comes to commercials. Especially Payton. Have a look.

Take a hike!

Loving the ‘stache!

And the brothers acting like… brothers.

All of these videos are funny and should have been considered. Most of Loco’s are probably funnier, but some of these should have had a shot. Much like bubble teams who didn’t get into the tournament, these “players” deserved a shot. Hope you enjoyed looking at them as much as I liked finding them.

OM

It is news that means rather little to your life, that is, unless you believe Susan Lucci to be the greatest actress since Faye Dunaway.

According to Manny Ramirez, he and past teammate Johnny Damon, “are back.”

Back from what? Last I checked both had become irrelevant, and overpaid. Back in Beantown? Not a chance. Back together? Absolutely. Do I hear the making of a Brokeback sequel?

Today Johnny Damon knotted a one year, 5.25 million dollar contract, and Ramirez, a one year, 2 million dollar deal with the crumbling Devil Rays.  They join a solid pitching rotation, boasting the likes of David Price, and do it all third basemen in Evan Longoria.

Any other off-season, signing two veterans like Ramirez and Damon would only strengthen your team. Both have won World Series’, and know what it takes to get there.  But this off-season, is not your normal off-season for the Rays. They’ve watched many of their central components go elsewhere. The biggest of these, Center fielder Carl Crawford, a rare breed of both speed, defensive prowess, and occasional power. Last year the star hit .307, with 19 homers, and 90 runs batted in, and over the last 8 years,  has averaged 50 stolen bases, making him the most sought after base stealer in the league. He was the set-up for a team in the top five in every major offensive category. Not to mention, a fan favorite, a guy who had built a name for himself in the Rays small market. Crawford’s positive locker room presence will be sorely missed for a team with a long list of young players. His nine seasons with the Rays, made him the longest tenured player on the club. Drafted in 1999, in the 2nd round, Crawford had stayed true blue to the organization that believed in him first; so losing him, is like losing your heart.

Another missing piece this season, will be first baseman Carlos Pena. Pena, who inked a one year deal with the Cubs, is best known as a defensive-minded first baseman, but also, a guy who can hit the long ball. Over the last four years, Pena has belted 144 homers, giving the Rays legitimate pop in the middle part of their lineup. He and Longoria were the pieces looked at to drive in runs, and create pitching problems for the opponents in the later innings. Now that Pena is gone, Longoria will have to pick up more of the slack–which  can lend itself to burn-out, then a few poor years, and ultimately a young player who never fully blossoms into the kind of player he could have become.

The burden is not only felt in the lineup. It is also felt on the pitching side of things. Losing Middle-reliever Juaquin Benoit to the Tigers, may not sound as serious as it is. But Benoit was the go to middle guy, who held opponents to a .147 batting average. He was the guy who kept things close if Price, Davis, Garza, or Shields had an off-night.

So let the Soap Opera begin.

Whether we want to admit it or not, Ramirez can still hit. The problem has never been getting one of the greatest hitters this league has ever seen to hit the ball out of the park, or drive in runs. It has always been his focus, his wayfarer attitude, his incessant need to spout ridiculous comments in the media; comments like “we’re back.”

Since being dealt to the Dodgers in 2008, Ramirez legacy has been severely tainted. After an incredible second half with L.A. in 2008, when the future Hall of Fame out-fielder hit .396, with 17 homers and 56 RBI, Ramirez spent a quarter of 09′ on the bench with both a league suspension, and a quandary of random injuries.  His sudden decline was not physical, rather a mental paradigm made of a growing disconnect between Manny, the man with 555 career home runs, and little “m” manny: the hippie, off-beat, Ricky Williams of Baseball.

The funniest thing about Manny Ramirez is the dude could hit the ball with one eye, high on cocaine. The last 100 games of 09′, the star hit .290, with 19 home runs, and 63 RBIs. He then came into training camp in 2010, with a bad attitude and a misery of peculiar injuries. Despite playing only 63 games with the Dodgers the first half of 2010, he hit .311. But when is enough, enough? When the Dodgers grew tired of little “m” manny, they gave him away to the Chicago Whitesox, where he played the most uninspired baseball of his life. It was like watching Bob Marley swing a bat with his dreads, then as he whiffed, do an Irish jig in a mini skirt.

Now that we are primed for 2011, to watch the high-on-self Ramirez, play his former team the Red Sox, 25-30 times, it will be an intriguing process to wait for Ramirez’s self-destruction, and his flammable comments in the media. I wonder what the small-town Rays will think of a figure like Ramirez, a man who finds little value in anything but to bother others with his naturally-lazy- ability to hit the baseball.

I hate saying it, but Ramirez is arguably the best hitter on the Rays. Yet as always, it will be a waiting game, as we determine which Manny will show. If big “M” decides to rear his mysterious head, another 40 homer, 125 RBI season, could be in the making. And sadly for a guy like the hardworking Longoria, he will probably be swallowed by the belly of a man who has always been able to steal the show from the just about everyone he comes in contact with.  But even if he does, it does not mean we will see a repeat of the 2010 Rays, a team of role guys, willing to sacrifice for every bit of their American league best 96 wins. With a pick-up like Manny, you know for every loss of a ‘w’, a willing television agency will be knocking on your door, asking to create a T.V. show based upon your life.

And sadly, in today’s sports world, money talks.

*Note that I am aware I did not talk about Johnny Damon in this article. And let me ask you, considering the brittle, overrated, thirty seven year old “has been”… do I really have to?

—Luke Johnson